Oh blog.
I’m back to being neglectful, and it has nothing to do with censoring the baby talk or even a lack of things to say. It does, however, have everything to do with the fact that I can’t trust myself to make sense these days.
Rumor has it that pregnancy does weird things to your hormones, which in turn does weird things to your brain. THESE RUMORS ARE TRUE, PEOPLE. I am living, breathing proof that pregnancy brain totally exists.
Here I was, thinking how lucky I am to have escaped the worst of it. Relatively minimal morning sickness. Few aches and pains to complain of. Reasonable weight gain. An innie that’s still an innie (for the moment, anyway). Pregnancy is awesome!
And then. Then baby started dangling by her feet from my ribcage and headbutting anything that gets too close. My new deodorant stopped doing anything for me. Again. My stomach started growling all the time despite the fact that most food just doesn’t sound very good anymore. My mouth lost the ability to form words the right way. Do you have any idea how many times in the last few weeks I have inadvertently used portmanteaus that make no sense whatsoever and then tried–unsuccessfully–to correct or explain myself? TOO MANY TIMES.
Plus I’m finally riding that super fun hormone roller coaster everyone warned me about. One minute it’s like, “Hmmmmm. Being pregnant is awesome. I could lounge here on the couch and do nothing but eat cookies and watch the baby move all day,” and the next minute it’s like, “GAAAHH! She’s going to be here any day and we are NOT READY! How am I ever going to get everything done in time?!” I’m go from being all mushy and snuggly and wanting to hug everyone in the whole world to wanting everyone in the whole world to never touch me ever again. Ever. Church is especially good at bringing out both sides of the beast. One minute I’m smiling serenely as we sing “Praise to the Lord, the Almighty” and only minutes later it’s taking all my willpower for me not to throw my water bottle at the speaker’s head if he doesn’t finish his stupid talk right this very minute!!
I’m a hot mess. And it’s affecting how I feel about blogging. I want to blog! But I hate blogging! But I miss blogging! But it doesn’t matter anyway because nobody reads my blog! But some people do and I like them and don’t want to abandon them! But blogging is a waste of time! But I like blogging! But I hate blogging!
I think you get the point.
Eventually I’ll get it together. Maybe 18 years from now when my house, my life, and my body are my own again.
I hear ya, I hear ya.
Oh wait, I forgot what I was going to say…
And then, just when your house, your life and your body are your own again, you'll start menopause and REALLY go crazy. Gotta love being a woman. God has such a great sense of humor.
I read your blog! And at least you have a reason to slide across the emotional spectrum. What's my excuse?
as in you forget things all the time when you're pregnant (i thought you didn't 'get' my comment)
I got it. I just didn't comment on it. Should I be doing that all the time?
apparently not! (you just always do, and i didn't want to look like an idiot)
I'll try to do better. I've just been neglectful lately. My bad.
you are forgiven. just blame it on the prego-ness. two more months?
Give or take! How long till you know what you're having?
may 2nd, 9:45 am PST, give or take!