I was going to post photos of all the be-skirted outfits I wore last week–mostly to prove that I did it–but then I didn’t take photos. I’ll do a many-wardrobe-changes photo shoot with myself to share here at some point. Not today.
Today I want to tell you about this plant.
What happened? Oh nothing. I just fertilized it.
I fertilized several other houseplants at the same time. They are fine. This one, however, was dead dead dead within a week. Evidently stuff that helps some plants grow is entirely toxic to others.
I’m sure there’s a metaphor in there somewhere. You fill in the details.
Since Home Depot recently had a sale on houseplants, I was able to replace my dead dracaena for only four bucks. Don’t tell it I accidentally massacred its predecessor. We’ll just avoid fertilizing this time around and everything should be peachy.
The moral of the story is: if at first you kill your plant, buy buy again. Also don’t assume that your efforts to keep it healthy are going to be well-received. More metaphors? Maybe.
The end.
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