Remember the series on marriage I started back in September? I had several dear friends and bloggers I admire fill out the same questionnaire about marriage and posted them during that month and beyond…and then I stopped. Well, it’s time to start that back up again!
I loved reading different perspectives on what makes a strong marriage. The
creeper busy body anthropologist in me enjoyed getting a peek into some healthy relationships, since so much of what is portrayed in the media is unrealistic, to say the very least. I’m all about keeping it real, folks.
Today we’re hearing from Mikaela, who blogs over at “All Things Bright and Beautiful.” She knows that life isn’t always shiny and happy, but she sure finds a way to put a bright, beautiful spin on things. I love the weekly pictures she posts of her darling man cub, I love her beautiful words and images, and most of all I love her positive attitude. Welcome, Mikaela!
us a little about your family!
and I met at an ultimate frisbee game. I like to think that my mad
skills won his love… even though that is probably an exaggeration.
Whatever the case may be, we sparked a great friendship and started
officially “dating” a few months after that. We have been married for
just a few days shy of 3 years and have one little boy named Eli who is
almost a year old.
is a pharmacist (or as I refer to him, a drug dealer… heh heh), and I
get to stay at home with Eli — something I am very grateful for! We love
to do anything outside, especially canyoneering, hiking, and ultimate
frisbee. We also really enjoy traveling, making (and eating) food
together, and just plain hanging out with each other as much as we can.
I am asked this question, I think about the time we had our first kiss.
It was just about as unromantic as it could possibly be. You can read
all about it here,
but long story short it ended with me cuddling with the toilet as I
barfed up my dinner. Oh baby. That’s hot, right? After that lovely
escapade, I didn’t think he would ever want to see me again, and to be
honest I really wouldn’t have blamed him for feeling that way after
having his girlfriend respond to his romantic gesture by puking her guts
out… haha! And yet he still called me the next day! It’s a pretty
comical example, but the fact that he still liked me just the same after
such an unattractive, embarrassing experience meant a lot to me. I
appreciated that I could be my unfiltered, dorky, silly self around him
and didn’t feel like I needed to change anything for him to like me
more. I felt like I was my best self when I was around him (you know,
minus the vomiting… ha!), and that my “best self” just kept getting
better the longer I knew him.
still “the one” because he always, always, always makes me happy. He is
the biggest goofball and he keeps me laughing every day. He balances
out my crazy, understands me better than anyone else, and takes good
care of me in every way. Life is just so much better with him around,
you know? He also loves our little babe so much and it just about makes
my heart explode to see them together.
I could go on and on about this one. Being married is pretty much the
sweetest setup. Not only to I get to see my bestest buddy every day, but
our entire lives are entwined together. I always have someone to pick
up my slack, scratch that itch on my back I can’t reach, cheer me up
when I need it, and snuggle with every day. It is so satisfying to do
all those things for Dallin in return too. Being a wife gives me the
opportunity to make him happy every day, and that is so fulfilling.
is one of the most difficult things you’ve had to overcome in your
first weeks and months after having my baby were really difficult. In
addition to adjusting to life with a newborn, which is hard enough in
itself, I got some postpartum depression that was pretty bad at times.
That was hard on both of us. Dallin always tells me that he is happy as
long as I am happy, so obviously when I was depressed it made him sad
too. Nothing except time really helped alleviate it completely, but
there were lots of things Dallin did to make life easier for me, and in
the end I think it strengthened our relationship. I’m thankful for that.
make it a point to be with each other as much as possible, whether it
is to go out on our weekly date or just run to the store because I
forgot to get milk. We also try to do simple acts of service for each
other every day. For example, we share an electric toothbrush and after
Dallin brushes his teeth he always swaps his head out for mine so it is
ready for me. It’s such a simple gesture, but it makes me happy every
each other’s happiness your priority, and be willing to make sacrifices
to do so. For example, Dallin really enjoys canyoneering and hiking. I
haven’t had a chance to go since having our baby, and that means he
often goes without me, sometimes for several days at a time. Even though
I miss him when he is gone (and occasionally feel a wee bit jealous),
it makes him happy, and seeing him happy makes me happy in return.
Happiness all around!
This right here: “Our entire lives are entwined together.” I love it. From the way Mikaela describes it, you can tell she’s not talking about codependency, but a desire to support and build each other up, to meet each other’s needs, and to be happy together. I know I’ll be thinking about how to create an entwined life for a while.
And aren’t they just the cutest family of gingers you ever did see? Thanks for sharing with us, dear!